The most wonderful of all
And the best of the best was Damm Charlatan, a smooth as silk 50 year old, with a large stomach and huge expense account. Indeed his silk was so smooth, that even the mighty Lion was tamed by its gentle caress.
Damm was a very busy man, flying here and flying there, building relationships as he went, sowing the seeds from which an order book might one day flourish. Damm believed that successful relationships were crucial. As he often said ‘foreplay begins at breakfast, and if we want to screw with this guy, we need a whole lot of seduction, I can’t do that on a chicken shit budget’.
Damm was assisted by Phony Lawless, a slightly younger man, with a bigger stomach. Phony was known for his revolutionary approach to his work. He saw opportunities where lesser men would fear to tread. At times his ideas were so unique that someone would say ‘Phony, perhaps you should try thinking inside the box for a while’. In meetings he would usually start an address by saying ‘don’t laugh at this one, but………’
Other than the Currant project, Aim-Meck Onshore Oil had little or no work, and it was the job of these two men to correct this. And as they conscientiously set to work, digging ever deeper into the company purse, trying to seduce, screw and even rape the worlds oil barons, a lone figure came back from Dublin having secured a £50m contract to destroy a large part of Irelands most beautiful coastline.